by Sue DeGregorio-Rosen, RN, CLNC

I listened to this story, and it touched my heart. I hope you will feel the same. Her name was Makaila, and she was beautiful. She stood in front of a group of alcoholics and drug addicts, she told her story with grace and integrity. She said that she was 60 years old, and she was such a radiant woman, poised and well spoken.

“Hello, my name is Makaila, and I am an addict. I define myself as a caring woman, and I will always be grateful to all of you, sitting here, interested in listening to what I have to share, and willing to embark on a journey that is difficult, and empowering. The journey that you are about to take will save your life, and will give you a life beyond your wildest dreams.

I am an addict. I have been an addict for a very long time. I have lied, stolen, cheated……I have been homeless and I have lived in luxury. My life has taken me to places that were both dangerous and miraculous. I am working the steps, the 12 steps, and I will continue to do so the rest of my life, because I am an addict. Addiction does not just go away. I know that if you go to God and ask him to help you, he will do so. God is my Higher Power. I am introducing myself to who I am today. Life has many more roads for me to travel that I was afraid to travel before. It’s taken me a long time to get here. I don’t want to turn back, and although my story is sad and hurtful, my Higher Power has allowed me another chance, one last chance to get it right. I am powerless when I use substances, whether it be alcohol or drugs. I don’t know how to stop on my own, and so that tells me that I am powerless and my life can be unmanageable. I need to respect those facts.

When I was a little girl I was taught fear, in a scary bathroom. It was dark and I was afraid. I don’t know what I was afraid of. I can’t remember what happened to me, but I do remember what happened later. These are the healing and creative states that I am inviting into my life now, to make an honest effort to help us all, and to believe in the truth. I choose now to be safe. I choose to be adaptable, I chose to be a source, and I chose to be. I hope you will join me to continue on this journey.

This is my prayer to embody faith in myself: ” God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change , the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

I leave you with these simple words: ” Do not be afraid, as angels are in your mist. Beautiful rays of sunshine, warm as a first kiss, wrapped so tight in loving arms. Know that you will not be harmed, know that Angels remain in your mist. Thank you, Peace”