The weekend. Masked. I was on a lake with a few friends, my grandsons and my husband. It was a 3-day weekend holiday. I had been looking forward to this weekend and hoped it would be more than I imagined, since summer had gone so fast and what can be said about 2020 to date and the year is not over yet.
I understand that I am not in control. And unfortunately, the weekend seemed to replicate the year as a whole, filled with emotions, disappointments, and some clarity. I met up with my anger, and her name is grief.
This year has sucked, but we have tried to make the best of it, regardless of Covid19 and the deaths we experienced among family, friends and the people I serve. And regardless of the restrictions in place, because I live in the epicenter of New York. The same site of 9/11, the city I worked in, the same city where I joined Occupy Wall Street. I was angry. I was pissed off, I was mad, and I really didn’t understand why.
As we relived the events of 9/11, I was initially confused, then quickly humbled by the abundance of first responders who were driving past me up into the danger at that same site, where I fed the same homeless man to fight the fires and the devastation. That memory of the eerie smoke in the distance and ensuing smoke and ash are reminders for me of my own grief, my own sadness, and what could have been my own demise. . I have not forgotten those that perished on that day.
In honor of all the first responders, not only current, but past events, 9/11 which is today, always comes to my mind and is never forgotten, and everyone who has lost a piece of themselves from both 9/11 and from Covid19 and for those who have lost loved ones, you are most revered and have our deepest sympathy. I am grieving for you, I am no longer angry, I am sad for all that we lost,
Thank you to those who continue to keep us safe and to all those who put themselves in harms’ way to protect us. I am a semi-retired trauma nurse, a mother, wife, grandmother, and most of all, I am a grieving woman. Our sacrifices this year and the years before had made us angry, have made us reach out to each other and that is truly A Labor of Love, and for that we are grateful. We, as a nation, can once more come together, we can do this.
So, stay informed. Stay blessed and stay humble. Peace out.