by Sue DeGregorio-Rosen, RN, CLNC, Contributing Editor

This series on estrangement seeks to understand some of the differing faces of estrangement and the crossroads it approaches for good or ill.

This personal, undelivered letter is on my desk where the estrangement caused by suffering, death and grief sits alone.

I wish I could tell you that the journey of grief has stages…you will get through them, at your own pace and not others.

I would also have to tell you that the process is not linear and definitely not unidirectional.

And just when you think you have found a semblance of sanity, one fine day without warning, anger and sorrow will punch you in the gut.

I wish I could tell you that this too shall pass but the words seem trite in the midst of depressed moments.

The seeds of the grief will linger within you, in joy and sorrow, and work and travel, in laughter and tears, in fun times and holidays.

The aloneness caused by grief will stay. As it should. For she was a part of your life; that will never change for you.

I wish I could fix this, but I know that I can’t. I have felt this kind of pain & grief, there are no explanations or answers, because the universe will always whisper to you, from the realm of her spirit and her angelic guidance will always surround you, with blessings deserved for those of us that are left behind to walk this path in silence………where time ceases to exist.