Short Story: The Pink Lotus

Credit. Pink Lotus. Sue DeGregorio-Rosen, Photographer

by Sue DeGregorio-Rosen, RN, CLNC, Contributing Editor

 

I was on my own, deeply engrossed in reading The Lotus Theory that a dear friend of mine had turned into a series that evolved into a seminar on trauma.  The Lotus, she said, activates divine wisdom.  In the far east, there is a special Lotus flower ritual in which the entire flower is placed into a bowl of hot water.  A wooden ladle is used to scoop out the tisane for each person who is involved in the ritual.  The hot Lotus infusion is known to be energizing and calming.

The Lotus is considered a sacred symbol in Asia which has branched out to our practices in Holistic Healing.  This flower is a plant of ancient wisdom. One of the oldest viable seeds, it was identified approximately 1300 years ago and is known to have a magical lotus effect that awakens within us a spiritual insight and understanding.

So, I am me. And you are you. I understand that part.

This Lotus Theory really spoke to me and my own journey into a deeper self -awareness. I am aware that my self-awareness looks nothing like yours.  I found myself, looking for more answers and searched for a local teacher to guide me into this kind of practice.

I found you, the teacher, in my search to practice more diligently to refine myself and tap into an area of wisdom that I had not experienced.

I loved your insights. I welcomed your stories about your travels in Korea.  I asked you to encourage me, please. I knew I had to move ahead and agree, and perhaps at times disagree. I invited your ideas and perspectives. I appreciated the time you spent with me and I wasn’t always sure that I was ready for the change that was required for me to advance to another level.  I may never be ready for some of them. I know to lower my expectations of where I think I should be, and just learn to be.  When the Pink Lotus speaks to me, it can simply be a reminder of the space I need to hold for myself and hope you do the same.

You taught me to take more time for myself, to make some time for prayer, to reflect on gratitude and to love myself, as you do.

You taught me how to make flower offerings and told me how it helps me to practice generosity.  Flowers for making offerings can be found in our gardens, or we can pick some from a local nursery or shop.  Flowers have unsurpassed purity, they bring so much joy to us, their fragrance, shapes and colors…….some more vibrant than others.

I followed your instructions.  I drew a bath that I added a sprinkle of some lavender essential oils adding a tiny splash of sandalwood. The water felt so soothing to me as I dipped my naked toe into what felt as nature should. You poured the water over my back and gave me a bouquet of tiny yellow roses for me to hold.  I understood the sentiment and felt comfortable with your presence.  I understood that I did not have to live up to your idea of me, that you did not expect your own self out of me. Your gentleness did not distract me, as I waited for you to take it to another level, one that felt the wildness of my own mind that refined me over time, as passion slide effortlessly.

It’s hard to work, figuring out what my idea of me really is—what I may have been buried beneath the beliefs I’ve held onto for far too long already. What new perspectives and wisdom arises in such an intimate moment?

Can you accept me as I am, now?

I am damaged goods in my own mind, and I am not healed, but I am egaged in the process of healing. Like the muddy swamp where the lotus grows is akin to my past, where my experiences were nothing more than my mistakes.

I am allowing this to happen, my path is my path. And I am where I am because I yearn for a spiritual path as a way of life that I wish to follow.

There are times that I feel my tears and lay still and do nothing at all.We were not cut from the same cloth. We cannot play the same game.

You step into the bath water with me.

I hope your love is enough to touch my Pink Lotus, as my petals open.  They are soft and delicate, but strong and fierce and that sparks us into the deepening, inner wisdom and justifies the beauty of the Lotus elixir……the catalyst of your strength, as I ask you to take me, take me gently to that next level.